The Bandersnatch Lair

Hey Valentine

Be my valentine? I’ve never had someone to ever call mine on valentines day. I was at a funeral last valentines day, my great grandma was being reunited with her husband who passed away 2 years prior and everytime I talked to her before (in terrible spanish) she’d always bring up her Pedro, her husband. It was devastating to see her that way, lost without her partner of 70+ years, her best friend. That’s true love there.. pure true love and raising 4 daughters together. You don’t really see marriages lasting that long nowadays.. it just doesn’t happen much. As they say, one left can’t live without the other much longer. I believe in true love because of my great grandparents. I know that there’s someone out there for everyone, its just a matter of waiting to really know who. I’m always searching the crowds and empty places. From standing in line at Starbucks waiting for my apple chai to walking to no place in perticular wishing someone would accompany me soon. I know they’re will be a day in my life and in yours that you and I will find the person we’ve always been looking for, promised even.. tucked away at the far end of the Earth.. waiting. Waiting  to meet us. Where are you valentine? Be mine. 

My Life On A Page, Word.

Anne Frank once said, “I want to go on living even after my death!” I want to be one of those people who do the little things for others that mean nothing to me, but are extraordinary to others. I want my name remembered someday.

They said “Freak,” and I believed them. I wish I said at the time, “Your wrong! I’m more than what you lable me!” Maybe then I would’ve been even more stronger than I am today.

I’m than just a girl confused why she is what she is, get to know me; there’s so much to me than what you see in front of you.

I told him I loved him, and to please stop drinking. He never listened to me. No i’m hurting here, knowing he’s 6 feet under.

I hope you know Christena, you saved my ass countless times, has been there for me through the thick and the thin. You were right, my place is here.

Desiri, Iraq never needed you, I did. Please come home safe.

I’ve learned God was never there, he was always there.

I feel like we’re all defined at my age by: age, weight, and SAT’s.

I met my best friend online, now i’m heading to Arizona to meet his ass.

I never understood these 4 things: math, life, time, and you.

My kitty stole my heart, God has her now, I miss her.

I was only popular in summer camp, thanks NWSRA for making my childhood brighter.

I learned who my real friends are, only got 3 who are for real.

An image expresses me, when words cannot.

I used to hate substance abusers, now I struggle to recover as one.

Eating is harder than it looks, I know because these jeans that once fit snuggly, are now baggy.

I was taught to be racist, to keep my race pure, I wonder to myself, “Am I really all that pure?”

I’ve only saw 2 shooting stars in my life, both times I was with a person who no longer remain on this Earth. I find it funnny how life works out.

4 days away from home and I come home obessed over England. It only took one person to do that, and an unending search to find him again.

My grandfather used to play The Beatles in his truck when he’d pick me up from school. He said one day we’ll go see one of them live. I went to go see Paul McCartney live a couple months ago, alone. Smoking to my grandfather away from me.

This is me, yo.